There is a conspiracy out there. Somewhere in the void of
life. This conspiracy is held among humanity, that somewhere there is a greater
unknown power, whether this be the Christians or the Environmentalists, it
seems that those of great education in either body of knowledge hold the belief
for a Reckoning of their own sorts to be true. This conspiracy that has already
defined its final causal event for the future of humanity is either a complex
spiritual experience of Judgement upon a ‘Soul’ or an addition to the many
multitude of the earth including past and future ancestors. At the time of
writing this, the end has already happened, and we are now of a new earth,
after this catastrophic event.
Saturday, May 4, 2019
Thursday, May 2, 2019
Graduated. Now What?
I just had my pass meeting with my advisors. There are a couple small tweaks I need to do with my final thesis paper ie. adding a table of contents, yada yada, but for the most part I'm finished with my Division III. My professors asked me if I wanted to ring the bell, which is a tradition at my school. I declined, as the bell has been ringing relentlessly this week and personally, I find it pretty annoying.
Feels good to get this research or whatever I created out of the way. I decided to not take such a scientific angle with what I am working on, and keep it more as a general discussion, since this project relies heavily on social issues. If I were to try and aim my survey at one direct construct it would limit the ability for me to have a more thoughtful discussion behind policy. I can understand why someone would not want to listen to my recommendations (as they are based on general information I collected) but I personally think its better than some economic model that only restricts the conversation into its own parameters.
Probably the best takeaway for myself personally was all the thinking I did of how to organize my study, the flow of the topics etc. All the thinking of this has made me a much better non-fiction writer because I understand time better. It is impossible to sit down and write everything down in one sitting, especially when you haven't done any digging into other crates of information. I learnt how to collect info from other research and my own field research to synthesize a text that could serve as a model for how to conduct ethical social research. This is why I changed the name from "survey" to "report" since survey implies that there is an underlying construct that I am trying to uncover, which was not the case. Instead, I had to adapt my questions to what I was observing so that some kind of numbers could be generated, whether or not they would be used for any specific hypothesis. As my sample increases though, and I ask more questions, come up with better ways to track the natural environment, I will be able to formalize the survey process. I think currently financial data and economic have been mixed inside my head but over time I will untangle these for future study's.
This summer I will be returning to Madagascar with two other researchers, a friend and my brother (maybe) to keep work developing a processing cooperative. I think this blog will turn into more of personal voice of myself, IDK. It's always been challenging to balance active and passive voice in my writing because I really just want to speak from my own context, but then people won't take me as seriously, because I'm just some dumb kid right?
Well I say prove 'em wrong. For all my young readers out there who happened to stumble upon this... Don't be afraid to stick up for your own opinions and beliefs. People will always disagree or debate what you do, but really all that matters is that YOU DO IT. That's the what makes the difference, people discussing what you put out, what you create, all of that in effect can only help you, if of course you are strong enough to take the criticism while still retaining your own core momentum. I started my career without a strong sense of who I was but by this year, I really felt complete. I still care about what people think about what I do (of course) but I also know that these people have their own background and their own motivations, entirely different from my own.
What are my motivations you may ask? I think the best way to summarize my motivation for life is my want to reinvigorate a lifestyle less about the labeling of personal human achievement and more about continuing your ancestry. My family's ties to Madagascar give me a responsibility to the country, especially because of all the different species of animals living their. What kind of project can actually regrow the rainforest though? It's gotta be a creative one, an adaptable one, and a responsible one. It's a tall order but it's what I must do. So there you go, I went with a classic 'destiny' argument to justify my motivation. What's your motivation for what you do?
Feels good to get this research or whatever I created out of the way. I decided to not take such a scientific angle with what I am working on, and keep it more as a general discussion, since this project relies heavily on social issues. If I were to try and aim my survey at one direct construct it would limit the ability for me to have a more thoughtful discussion behind policy. I can understand why someone would not want to listen to my recommendations (as they are based on general information I collected) but I personally think its better than some economic model that only restricts the conversation into its own parameters.
Probably the best takeaway for myself personally was all the thinking I did of how to organize my study, the flow of the topics etc. All the thinking of this has made me a much better non-fiction writer because I understand time better. It is impossible to sit down and write everything down in one sitting, especially when you haven't done any digging into other crates of information. I learnt how to collect info from other research and my own field research to synthesize a text that could serve as a model for how to conduct ethical social research. This is why I changed the name from "survey" to "report" since survey implies that there is an underlying construct that I am trying to uncover, which was not the case. Instead, I had to adapt my questions to what I was observing so that some kind of numbers could be generated, whether or not they would be used for any specific hypothesis. As my sample increases though, and I ask more questions, come up with better ways to track the natural environment, I will be able to formalize the survey process. I think currently financial data and economic have been mixed inside my head but over time I will untangle these for future study's.
This summer I will be returning to Madagascar with two other researchers, a friend and my brother (maybe) to keep work developing a processing cooperative. I think this blog will turn into more of personal voice of myself, IDK. It's always been challenging to balance active and passive voice in my writing because I really just want to speak from my own context, but then people won't take me as seriously, because I'm just some dumb kid right?
Well I say prove 'em wrong. For all my young readers out there who happened to stumble upon this... Don't be afraid to stick up for your own opinions and beliefs. People will always disagree or debate what you do, but really all that matters is that YOU DO IT. That's the what makes the difference, people discussing what you put out, what you create, all of that in effect can only help you, if of course you are strong enough to take the criticism while still retaining your own core momentum. I started my career without a strong sense of who I was but by this year, I really felt complete. I still care about what people think about what I do (of course) but I also know that these people have their own background and their own motivations, entirely different from my own.
What are my motivations you may ask? I think the best way to summarize my motivation for life is my want to reinvigorate a lifestyle less about the labeling of personal human achievement and more about continuing your ancestry. My family's ties to Madagascar give me a responsibility to the country, especially because of all the different species of animals living their. What kind of project can actually regrow the rainforest though? It's gotta be a creative one, an adaptable one, and a responsible one. It's a tall order but it's what I must do. So there you go, I went with a classic 'destiny' argument to justify my motivation. What's your motivation for what you do?
Saturday, April 27, 2019
Advice for those with Personality Disorders/Bipolar Disorder
This is my own personal advice so don't take it to be 100% effective or anything but my advice to those suffering form personality disorders or bipolar disorder is to learn another language.
The benefits of learning another language are many. It can help you get a job, pretty much everywhere needs bilingual workers now so you'll have an edge over other people. It also opens the doors to another culture that you can now communicate with because you have learned the language. Now, I'm not saying go run off to Bolivia and ditch your old life, but try to learn a language that could be practical in your current life. In this way it will be easier for you to practice with other people in the radius of where you are living. Luckily for me, I live in an area with people who speak a wide array of different languages so I can practice languages like Farsi here. If you don't have anyone other than your own native language to speak to then look online for pdf's or audio files for a language that has literature you would like to read. This way you can comfortably enjoy these works in their native tongue and pick up on the full intention of the author.
When I have spoke to other people who are bilingual they have told me that when they speak in another language they embody a different personality. They also told me some interesting things about their dreams. When they have a dream in another language than the one they speak most often it is a drastically different experience than their regular dreams. People who speak in two languages often do not report experiencing this.
If anything it can be a regular morning routine or something, to wake you up and keep working at. There are lots of different ways to study with flashcards and software but I think people can figure that out for themselves. My personal favorite way is to have a conversation with someone. This helps me gauge my actual aptitude in using the language. But I know of people who learned entirely by listening to audio everyday for a period of time.
Anyways, once you learn a language if you don't practice consistently you will forget how to speak in it. All you need to do is some prepping before hand and you'll be much better. Repetitive practice is the best way to learn a language. Always practice speaking.
The benefits of learning another language are many. It can help you get a job, pretty much everywhere needs bilingual workers now so you'll have an edge over other people. It also opens the doors to another culture that you can now communicate with because you have learned the language. Now, I'm not saying go run off to Bolivia and ditch your old life, but try to learn a language that could be practical in your current life. In this way it will be easier for you to practice with other people in the radius of where you are living. Luckily for me, I live in an area with people who speak a wide array of different languages so I can practice languages like Farsi here. If you don't have anyone other than your own native language to speak to then look online for pdf's or audio files for a language that has literature you would like to read. This way you can comfortably enjoy these works in their native tongue and pick up on the full intention of the author.
When I have spoke to other people who are bilingual they have told me that when they speak in another language they embody a different personality. They also told me some interesting things about their dreams. When they have a dream in another language than the one they speak most often it is a drastically different experience than their regular dreams. People who speak in two languages often do not report experiencing this.
If anything it can be a regular morning routine or something, to wake you up and keep working at. There are lots of different ways to study with flashcards and software but I think people can figure that out for themselves. My personal favorite way is to have a conversation with someone. This helps me gauge my actual aptitude in using the language. But I know of people who learned entirely by listening to audio everyday for a period of time.
Anyways, once you learn a language if you don't practice consistently you will forget how to speak in it. All you need to do is some prepping before hand and you'll be much better. Repetitive practice is the best way to learn a language. Always practice speaking.
Wednesday, April 24, 2019
Dead Alive movie review
Dead Alive or Braindead (the North American title) is Peter Jackson's horror cult classic, done with awesome special effects, hilarious acting, and endless gags. You don't even need to know the plot of this film to enjoy it. Just load it up at any place and you'll be laughing. For me that's really appealing, especially since I like to watch movies so that I can critique the wasted effort of some horse shit. This film is so conscious of the fact of how easy it is to objectively call this film horseshit though that I immediately fell in love with it
It's in some ways not dark enough though, like the film is just one shade away from being covered in a decent amount of abyssal blackness. Maybe it has something to do with the setting, although things get darker and darker as the movie progresses.
I don't want to spoil anything but this movie is a must-watch
My Score 8/10
Saturday, April 13, 2019
Silent Hill: Revelation
This film right here, I knew it was going to be bad before I even started it. I feel bad carrying these feelings into a viewing of a film before watching it, but for this..... it hit to close to home. Silent Hill is one of my favorite series... so I have to preface this beforehand, just so that I can express what a let down this movie is. I'm also not that picky about what has been released as many. I like pretty much every game and soundtrack, including Downpour and Silent Hill 4. I also enjoyed the first Silent Hill movie thoroughly. Sadly, this movie is a complete wreck compared to any of these other releases and let me explain why.
This film is more conventional form of Silent Hill 3, following a re-imagining of Heather's story line in the video game. If this wasn't already bad enough, they had to also create a boy-toy/boy-friend character (I can't really pin him down as his role in the film is very very very rough) and made Heather a high-schooler. These elements magnify the films extraordinarily shallow interpretation of Silent Hill 3's story line, not even grasping the Otherworld element, or the cult aspect, or even glimpsing the unsettling ambiance that anything else in the franchise has achieved.
The plot and dialogue are dog shit, the execution dog shit, with the only thing being of interest the gore and special effects (which are not at all aspects of which that make the Silent Hill franchise such effective pieces of art). The plot consists of Heather seeing jarring hallucinations of little creative value, until around 40 minutes in when the bell starts to ring and Heather walks around the ash laden landscape of this versions re-imagining of the Silent Hill Town. But instead of any of these hallucinations being used to build atmosphere or effect, they are used simply as eye candy for those hungry for more Silent Hill. Anyone who actually respects the best that this franchise can offer will be sordidly pissed off about how one of the few horror series that gives such a beauty to the abject, the suffering, and the alienated has now been used to generate quick and easy eye-candy for the gluttonous masses of consuming imbeciles.
The dialogue in this is used alongside facial gestures to give these cavemen written scenes some more substance than the watered down monkey business they are offering us. Really, it is only things like "You are following me!" with a scared face or "Come back home quick.." With a concerned face. The cringiest are the scenes with the boy-toy character, absolute horse-shit.
Look... just don't watch this, especially if you are a fan of Silent Hill. It simply puts me in a bad mood knowing hat they gave 20,000,000 in budget to a guy who doesn't give a shit about a Silent Hill but who could possibly use the mainstream success to make a couple bucks.
My Score: 2/10
Evil Dead (2013) Review
I began to feel a bit woozy around 10 minutes into the movie when the brother & sister characters started to reminisce. This scene, and many others reveal the strange pacing at how the story is shot & the more woodsy-wild feel to the movie than other Evil Dead releases. Unfortunately, this pairs poorly with the best parts of this movie, particularly the dialogue. The poor writing makes all the characters stiff and lacking in vivid motion. The opening shot of the movie was fantastic though, really brought me back to the first time I watched Evil Dead II. The book illustrations look fairly amateurish as well, and the scene where the character with the glasses scratches a pencil over paper to reveal a secret message in the book of the dead is completely unnecessary.
The opening scene creates an omen for the rest of the main story to come, which centers around the demonic force of a female character. This demonic witch trope is an interestingly executed device in this film. The character appears very different to other characters in Evil Dead films, making this film attempt a more psychological leaning, especially with the drug addiction theme. This though creates a major issue for me though, all the witch themes, woods themes, more focus on attempting to create characters with empathizing backgrounds all detracts from the what always made these films great in the first place. It makes me gather that the this film did not know its intended audience and only effected to create a haphazard mix of a fantasy flick and over produced b-gag horror gimmicks.
My Rating: 4/10
The opening scene creates an omen for the rest of the main story to come, which centers around the demonic force of a female character. This demonic witch trope is an interestingly executed device in this film. The character appears very different to other characters in Evil Dead films, making this film attempt a more psychological leaning, especially with the drug addiction theme. This though creates a major issue for me though, all the witch themes, woods themes, more focus on attempting to create characters with empathizing backgrounds all detracts from the what always made these films great in the first place. It makes me gather that the this film did not know its intended audience and only effected to create a haphazard mix of a fantasy flick and over produced b-gag horror gimmicks.
My Rating: 4/10
Monday, April 8, 2019
Internet Survival. Using the internet to Adapt to World or to Obstruct it?
One thing that is not really noted about why possibly humans spend so much time on the internet is that they are learning to adapt to other stressors. My generation (or anyone who grew up with the internet) has a different brain than those who grew up without the internet. Children and young people now have neurons that are more evenly distributed, which makes us more fluid behaviorally. As Spinoza first noted, knowledge is the road to unification and those who have grown up with the internet have been advocating for this during their whole life without even actively knowing it.
In the virtual realm, there is no limit to what you can experience albeit behind a screen and with speakers. Still, these experiences involve a 3rd party intermediary but they can simulate so well and so close to the reality that they are seemingly unable to be dreampt about. If you sense you are experiencing the large Atlas mountains of Morocco, than how can your mind distinguish if you were there or not? Imagination relies upon a conception of something but not the full frontal view of this conception, lets say for the sake of conversation that is can conceive of 50% of the full conception. The other 50% is hidden from view, this could be the actual understanding of a concept as a sensory experience instead of reading about it for instance. But now, lets add sounds, pictures, humans, and glowing bright screen. Does this bump up our understanding of the conception from 50 to 75 percent? I think not. Personally, I see it as a mirroring of the actual experience, and sadly, it shows the limited capabilities of the human sense. Unfortunately for us as internet users we have seen the world and we are disillusioned by it. In a mirror many underlying features are left unnoticed, most notably psychological processes, so these internet forms of reality or actually obstructions of reality.
What do you think?
In the virtual realm, there is no limit to what you can experience albeit behind a screen and with speakers. Still, these experiences involve a 3rd party intermediary but they can simulate so well and so close to the reality that they are seemingly unable to be dreampt about. If you sense you are experiencing the large Atlas mountains of Morocco, than how can your mind distinguish if you were there or not? Imagination relies upon a conception of something but not the full frontal view of this conception, lets say for the sake of conversation that is can conceive of 50% of the full conception. The other 50% is hidden from view, this could be the actual understanding of a concept as a sensory experience instead of reading about it for instance. But now, lets add sounds, pictures, humans, and glowing bright screen. Does this bump up our understanding of the conception from 50 to 75 percent? I think not. Personally, I see it as a mirroring of the actual experience, and sadly, it shows the limited capabilities of the human sense. Unfortunately for us as internet users we have seen the world and we are disillusioned by it. In a mirror many underlying features are left unnoticed, most notably psychological processes, so these internet forms of reality or actually obstructions of reality.
What do you think?
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